Insanity, thy name is Christy

[kissa_bites]

I used to be a sane person. Then, I informed my best beloved that we were getting married. Then, I repeated myself. Now, apparently, we actually are doing this thing, date and all, and now I am a crazy person. Invitations, no colors on the invitations, so we can print them easily - and oh damn, can I do that on cardstock, flowers – did you know Costco does bouquets and bulk roses, dresses, rings, marriage licenses (do I have to take a written test for this like a driver's license test - sheesh) favors, garden vs. church vs. deck, and where’s the reception, get Costco to do the cake, damn it, and where the hell did all of these people come from, and mothers... LOTS of mothers.

My mother is now a crazy person, too. She went to Michaels to "get ideas". Now she has ideas. This is both good and bad. She has a LOT of ideas (formal portraits - wtf?) to stuff for kids to do during the reception (keeping kids busy so they don't wreck havoc - quelle concept) and favors - everything from picture frames to key chains (please tell me why someone would want a keychain with my name and wedding date on it? That's just dumb.) Tell me why the frell I have to invite my cousins. They didn't invite me to their weddings *sticks tongue out in the manner of a four year old*. My mother tells me it's because I am a better person and it's good for the family. I think she means I'm willing to spend money on people I really don't like enough to call on the weekend.

I used to be sane. Once upon a time. Now, I am slowly turning into Bridezilla.

Comments

[benevolntgoddes.livejournal.com]

MY mother is driving me insane. His mother is mostly staying out of my way - mostly. Of course, when she does call or come over... well, she's very excited and I just can't tell a 74 year old woman to calm down. I will live and call it a testament to my goodwill and patience. The other mother-types are... trying to be helpful. I listen so I can glean any good ideas and smile and say thank you for the rest. *sighs*

You poor woman, you catered your own wedding? Dear Lord! I was just hoping for nibbles and finger food but *wince* apparently my mother would like something different. This is fine because SHE is hiring them, SHE is handling them and SHE is paying for them. I am just checking it off my list of to-do's. So be it and if it's sauerkraut and sausage or cabbage and potatoes... well... okay.

I think it highly unlikely that my cousins will bring anything. This is one where I am just bending to the will of my mother. I don’t need to talk to them or take photos with them or any such thing. They will all clique together (four cousin girls, two husbands) and not bother anyone else – so be it. I am going to let my mother smirk and her cousin an say something like, “I know the girl didn’t invite Christy but our side of the family thinks family is sooooo important at life changing events….”

The mugs are a great thought, I probably wouldn’t have thought of them – thanks!

[bonsaibetz.livejournal.com]

Don't invite the cousins then. Tell you mom they didn't invite you and if she wants to pay to feed cheap, ungrateful relatives that will only annoy you on YOUR special day, well then, she'll just have to live with the guilt of ruining your wedding day if they piss you off. (You want some gravy on your deep-fried guilt?) Don't do it to please your mom, only do it if it will please you that they will feel like crap for not inviting you or you KNOW that they will leave you alone.

I didn't do anything as easy as finger foods. I did the whole hors d'ouerve table (with 20 lbs of shimp for 100 people that was GONE! in a flash, crudites, cheeses, fresh fruits, crackers) for nibbles BEFORE the dinner, which was wild rice pilaf, chicken cordon bleu and roast fillet. I catered a lot of events over the years and my mom and I always cooked more than was needed, but she and I have NEVER seen people eat like they did at my wedding. 100 people ate like 150 people. Usually there are leftovers from an event, but there was jsut barely enough for this group.

If the mother-types want to be offer help, then delegate. This will keep them busy, keep them out of your hair with a project, make them feel useful so they don't bug you anymore and you have one less thing to worry about that is now in the hands of a competent adult who is eager to help. I could have used a bevy of those type of women with my wedding, but alas, all my female friends flaked and female relatives did too, with the exception of my sister - but she was 8 months pregnant at the time, so she couldn't do much.

Glad to provide one good piece of advice with the mugs.

[benevolntgoddes.livejournal.com]

There is a possibility of them feeling guilty. I am actually running with that one. I feel a bit bad about forcing guilt - but not much.

WOW! You actually made stuff, holy cow! I just know I don't have the energy to do that. Even the first wedding was to be catered - of course, that was 250 people. I'm just glad my mother is taking care of it.

My mom is doing a lot, but I don't really know what the other mom-types can do. If I think of something, I'm absolutely going to use them! I'm trying to avoid dumping stuff to do on my friends - hopefully it'll work. *wince*