“if you want to be my friend…”

 

“tell me or I’m deleting you.”

I’ve gotten, seen and been witness to many of these notes on 360 and IM recently. I ignore them simply because I think they are rather arrogant.

Here’s my take on it – I’m happy to read about your life and chat with you when you want it. I’m not going to force myself on you, nor do I consider reading about your life and thoughts or chatting in IM to be forcing yourself on me. I don’t need to read about your life if you don’t want me to, nor do I need you to read about mine (I actually rather prefer having a very small list of people who know my inner thoughts.) If you don’t want me to read your thoughts, I won’t. It’s easy – a click. If you do, don’t delete me. Also easy – not a click. Your “cleaning” really has nothing to do with me. It has to do with you. If, because I don’t respond to you, you delete me from your stuff – well, okay. That certainly tells me about my value to you. I’m okay with that.

I don’t approach many to chat in IM or PM. I’m of the thought that everyone is busy and they’ll say hi when they want to. I'm not about to stalk someone. If you want to talk to me, I’m here and I’ll be thrilled to chat. The fact that you are on my IM list means that somehow, sometime, you wanted to be. So be it. If you want to delete me, okay. I don’t care – really, nor do you need to tell me. It’s likely we weren’t talking all that much anyway – if ever. I’m probably pretty good with that, too. (I rather feel the same about the whole being invisible on IM thing – I take that as a hint about you not wanting to talk to me.)

I don’t feel that I should have to announce my intention to be your friend to actually be one. So, if I’m on your 360 or in your IM, you can pretty well figure that I want to be – if I’m not there… well, you can take that as a hint if you need to, too. Please, though, don’t ask me to chime in that I want to be somewhere – you may not like the answer if I’m in a particular mood.